Starting Hospice with Terminal Cancer

January 12, 2023

Last Friday, I started noticing that my tummy and legs were puffy. When I weighed myself, I found that over the week I had gained ten pounds in water. I remembered being at this point a year and a half ago when I was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer and recognized that what I am experiencing is called ascites. It indicates that my liver is not working well and is a sign that I am nearing the end with my cancer.


Though I'm incredibly tired and a bit achy, my lungs are still clear and everything is still working pretty well even with a cancer CA125 count of nearly 3,000. I am having to eat small amounts at a time since eating much gives me major heartburn. I also have no appetite and feel a little nauseous, but I'm still able to eat. I'm feeling very blessed, and today I'm enjoying the sunshine as we begin the process of entering hospice care.

A challenge I have in dealing with near end cancer is that I also have other health problems such as a heart murmur and "chronic fatigue". Though I have been ill all my life, it wasn't until they tested me for the BRCA2 mutation that I also learned that my poor health has been caused by another gene mutation. This serious "loss-of-function" gene variant causes a "loss of normal protein function" and is therefore leaving me with little strength to deal with terminal cancer.

I now realize that I have been greatly blessed to do all that I have done during my life, especially having four children, and I am grateful that my Heavenly Father understands how difficult old age would have been for me and is mercifully allowing me to come home sooner. My hope and peace is not in trying to heal my fast failing body, but in the Lord's great plan. I am looking forward to my new "mission" on the other side and receiving a new body that is whole and eternal. I know that the Lord will be with me to the end of my time here.




*Photo is me reading a Christmas story to my grandchildren. I feel so blessed that I was able to have such a special Christmas. It was another assurance to me of my Savior's love for me.