People have asked me how I’m doing, and I say “pretty good for the circumstances”. The circumstances are that my ovarian cancer has returned and is progressing very quickly. My cancer indicator number increased from 500 at the end of November to nearly 3000 the first week of January, and is probably far above that now. I’ve had ascites for the last month, which is a fluid buildup in the abdomen that you get with end-stage cancer. I no longer have any appetite, and I tire exceptionally quickly. My eyes are having trouble focusing, so I can no longer ride in a car, read, or write. My husband is very kindly typing this for me. At moments, like when I realized I couldn’t go for a ride any more, or when I realized that I won’t be here for a holiday or a special occasion, I cry. When I’m reminded that I won’t be here with my husband, I cry. My emotions are very tender at this time.
