Peace at Christmas

He couldn’t be serious, but my husband seemed quite serious when he declared, “If that’s how you are at Christmas, we won’t celebrate it.” What was I doing wrong? This wasn’t the joyful time I had anticipated.

We had only been married a few months, and as our first Christmas together approached, I became increasingly tired, pressured, and grouchy. I was also lonely. My husband was going to school and working full time with a two hour commute, so he was rarely home, leaving me alone in a small trailer with no transportation. Since he was a mailman, he was working overtime seven days a week to keep up with the holiday rush. Yes, I was lonely, but I felt I was learning to cope. I kept my environment bright and cheerful, put up decorations, played Christmas music, turned on the lights, and kept my entertainment positive and up-beat, avoiding sad tear-jerkers. I planned things to do and kept busy. What helped the most was finding another neighbor who’s husband also worked late. We spent many evenings together happily working on projects.

My Remarkable Life

“No matter our age, circumstances, or abilities, each one of us can create something remarkable of his life,” Elder Wirthlin declared during April 2006 General Conference. Even me? Mentally I began to list my considerable health problems and all the limits they imposed, then I stopped — Even Me!
Slowly, I began to realize that I was allowing my health restrictions to imprison my soul. Where was my joy in living?

As I prayed for help in living a more meaningful life, I felt strongly that I needed to simplify my life by removing all unnecessary things and activities. This certainly didn’t seem to me to be the way to an abundant life!

I asked the Lord for faith, then, resignedly, began to eliminate non-essentials. Despairing, I could only see a bleak, barren existence stretching out before me. Maybe I needed to learn patience and endurance. It seemed so obvious to me that having better health and being able to do more would bring me happiness.

Simplifying Service

The question I had to ask myself was what did “magnifying my calling” really mean. (Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are offered "calls" to serve the Lord such as to teach a Sunday School class.) To me it requires a willing heart and a total commitment to do what the Lord would have me do. When I feel tempted to follow precedent and do what other people expect, such as making fancy handouts, gifts, or writing out a soliloquy to present for a lesson, I pray. Praying helps me to focus on the goals the Lord wants, instead of focusing on pleasing people and gaining the applause of men (and women).

I have found that keeping my focus on eternal goals helps me be far more effective. I ask the Lord’s help to know what He wants me to do. What change am I to help bring about in others lives? What do these people really need to help them progress toward exaltation? On what should I concentrate my time and energies?

Now, instead of waiting till I have the proper gift, I simply extend my love by  visiting, calling, or sending a postcard to a person I visit teach. Instead of spending endless hours writing out a prepared script, I simply make notes on the concepts and references that should be presented in a lesson. (With younger children, I also make notes of learning activities that can be used to reinforce each concept.) This simple approach not only keeps the attention on the important principles, but allows for class involvement in the lesson, and thereby helps them apply these principles in their lives.

Besides being less tired and pressured  I find that when I eliminate all the “non- essentials”, I am more flexible and far more responsive to the promptings of the Spirit. Keeping my focus on the Lord’s goals, instead of people’s expectations helps me to both magnify and simplify my Church service.

How Does a Creative Person Keep House?

I have always loved the story of the two sisters, Mary and Martha. When Martha complains to the Lord that Mary isn't helping enough with the housework, the Lord replies that Mary has chosen the better part. I see myself as a Mary.

Since I have no intention of ever becoming  a "busy little homemaker", is my home a mess? It is true that I don't weed, mow, vacuum, shampoo rugs or furniture, polish furniture or silverware, or "deep clean". I spend my day writing and love it. I also have major allergies and must have a dust and mold free home, and I do. My house is very clean and orderly. You may wonder how I can do this. It's really not that hard. I just decided to