Though I am glad that my chemo treatments and ovarian cancer surgery went so well, I have to accept that I will never be completely "healed" from cancer. The fact is that most cancer just goes into remission and may return at some point (recurrence). Ovarian cancer is particularly known for cycles of remission and recurrence, especially when you are not diagnosed until it has progressed to a later stage. By the time we discovered that I had ovarian cancer, I was at Stage 3c which means that though it had not yet invaded other organs, cancer cells covered all my organs in my entire abdomen. Most of this cancer was destroyed by the chemo treatments, then all visible cancer was removed during the surgery, but microscopic cancer cells still exist within me which could possibly grow in some other part of my body.
Since I also have the BRCA2 gene mutation which makes it so my body is unable to repair cell damage, I have a much higher chance of developing cancer. Those with BRCA2 have a 45-55% chance of developing breast cancer compared with the normal 7% risk (12% for a lifetime). I also have a much higher chance of having pancreatic cancer, skin melanomas, and other cancers.
Having to tell my two daughters and my two sons that they have a 50% chance of also having the BRCA2 gene mutation has been hard for me to do. Remembering that my dad and my brother (my only sibling) both died when they were only 69 of aggressive prostate cancer which quickly went into the bone has reminded me of how important it is that my children know their genetic risks. My brother died just a few months before I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. If my dad and brother had known that the BRCA2 ran in our family and that they had a five times greater chance of developing prostate cancer, they could have had more frequent and through testing and probably would not have died so young.
Having both ovarian cancer and the BRCA2 gene, I accept that taking the anti-cancer medication, Lynparza, is necessary for me to continue living even though it tires me, suppresses my immune system, and has taken away my appetite and much of my sense of taste. I am adjusting to resting and relaxing more, asking for more help in keeping up my home, and wisely choosing my commitments. I have been given an opportunity to evaluate what is most meaningful in my life and to focus both my limited energy and time on these activities. I'm enjoying pondering the scriptures, sharing family history stories, photos, and my experiences, learning digital photography and watercolor, enjoying nature, going on short walks, sending encouraging notes to others, and spending time with my family and friends. Most of all, I feel at peace as my Savior's love surrounds me and as I turn to Him for the strength to help me face living with cancer for the rest of my life, however long that may be.
(photo of my dad and my brother in 1972)
Having to tell my two daughters and my two sons that they have a 50% chance of also having the BRCA2 gene mutation has been hard for me to do. Remembering that my dad and my brother (my only sibling) both died when they were only 69 of aggressive prostate cancer which quickly went into the bone has reminded me of how important it is that my children know their genetic risks. My brother died just a few months before I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. If my dad and brother had known that the BRCA2 ran in our family and that they had a five times greater chance of developing prostate cancer, they could have had more frequent and through testing and probably would not have died so young.
Having both ovarian cancer and the BRCA2 gene, I accept that taking the anti-cancer medication, Lynparza, is necessary for me to continue living even though it tires me, suppresses my immune system, and has taken away my appetite and much of my sense of taste. I am adjusting to resting and relaxing more, asking for more help in keeping up my home, and wisely choosing my commitments. I have been given an opportunity to evaluate what is most meaningful in my life and to focus both my limited energy and time on these activities. I'm enjoying pondering the scriptures, sharing family history stories, photos, and my experiences, learning digital photography and watercolor, enjoying nature, going on short walks, sending encouraging notes to others, and spending time with my family and friends. Most of all, I feel at peace as my Savior's love surrounds me and as I turn to Him for the strength to help me face living with cancer for the rest of my life, however long that may be.
(photo of my dad and my brother in 1972)
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