49 Years of Marriage - It has been worth it!

When I mentioned to a worker at the hospital that we would soon be celebrating our 49th wedding anniversary, she was amazed. She told me that she had all ready made two "mistakes" and was now in another relationship. As we discussed how we were committed to working out our marriage and united in our goals, she mentioned her doubts on her current relationship. He was too permissive with her two children (13 year old boy and 7 year old girl). I told her how that was pretty normal for most couples. One might allow the children to have more experiences out in the world (usually the man), while the other was more protective of the children (usually the woman). We discussed how you had to talk about these differences and work out a balance that would be best for the children at their current age. 

How can you have a lasting marriage?

A friend and I were discussing how marriage has changed since we were  married in the 1960's and early 1970's. There has been some good changes in marriage. On the whole, women are better educated, trained, and paid. Consequently, they have been empowered to demand to be treated with greater respect and to have more assistance from the rest of the family with house responsibilities. Another consequences of women now being able to provide adequately for themselves and their children is that many are divorcing their husbands. 

I saw this same situation several years ago when we sponsored a Cambodian refugee family who fled to the United States. Women had no rights in their country. Men owned them and could, with family assistance, drag a fleeing wife home and beat her into submission. When these wives found that they could earn a good living themselves and that the police here would protect them from their husband, many divorced their husbands.